So You’ve Got Your Sexy Keto Body… Now What?

The Point with Getting Fit on Keto Is to Live Your Best Life – Here Is How!

To Dare Is to Lose One’s Footing Momentarily. Not to Dare Is to Lose Oneself. Soren Kierkegaard

The biggest reason I hear to people going keto is slimming down. They’re fed up with the fat and want to have fun wearing whatever they want; feel sexy dressing up again. I get it: I used to be bloated before keto, and it wasn’t fun. On keto, I quickly dropped my extra kilos, and I’ve been slim for a few years now. As a keto coach, it’s now my passion to help others achieve the same.

But what surprises many of my clients once they’ve gotten to the “right” number on the scales, is that so much more is on offer than just having a good time dressing up. Finally being comfortable in their skin and feeling confident, plus having the energy and mental clarity of ketosis, is an unexpected superpower. All of a sudden, there are so many possibilities! As an example, Prerna has started a new business. Mohammed is enjoying beach life. Varsha is now socializing and having fun with her hobbies. THAT is what excites me about keto: not counting net carbs and measuring ketosis, but what you can do with your life when poor health and extra kilos aren’t holding you back!

I’ve obsessed about creating my “dream life” for as long as I can remember. I left home in a small country town in Sweden at age 15. I remember taking the bus to the “big city” of Gothenburg with just a suitcase and my stereo, listening to Jimi Hendrix and thinking: “NOW it’s all going to happen!” I promised myself that I would never go back to boredom and that I’d make my best life happen. For sure, at least I haven’t been bored since making that promise.

Three years after leaving home, the day straight after high school graduation, I left Sweden to continue my search for ultimate living. I traveled the world, studied in Australia, made a corporate career in London, started a business in Dubai… Whenever I got a new dream, I did everything in my power to make it happen.

It might sound pretty exciting, but for most of my adventures, I felt more or less lost. I had no idea when I left home that adult life would be so bloody difficult! I struggled with depressions and addictive behavior, including food addiction (the reason behind my aforementioned bloating), I experienced one financial crisis after the other. Because being obsessed about making dreams come true come at a cost. As an example: when I got my first apartment in Dubai, I was so broke that I spent the first few days sleeping on a stone floor. When I got my paycheck a few days later and could finally go to IKEA, a children’s mattress was all that fitted my tiny budget (thank goodness I’m slim on keto).

There was also the pressure from my family to conform to THEIR idea of a “best life” – which is the inspiration to the cartoon of this blog post. Because my family has never been big fans of what they view as my “crazy” ideas: my parents’ wish for me is to get a 9-5 job, marry a Swedish man and settle down in their town in Sweden. Despite all of my confusion over what my best life looks like, I know for sure what it does NOT look like, and that’s exactly it.

Earlier this year, I went to Costa Rica on a “life-transformative” retreat. Before I’d left, I’d been all set on settling down in Dubai – I was taking Arabic classes and everything. But now when returning to Dubai, it just didn’t feel right anymore – and I couldn’t understand why. It had been my big dream to succeed with my keto coaching, and now finally, my career was going well. I had even upgraded to an adult mattress with a real bed frame! But that didn’t matter much when I was feeling empty inside.

Looking back, I now realize that Dubai – as exciting as it can be – and I weren’t a good fit. I felt lonely. I felt stressed by city life. I realized that whatever financial success I might have felt pointless if I didn’t have likeminded people around me. Research confirms this: having close relationships is the most important factor for happiness.

Once again, I felt lost. Would my confusion ever end?! Where would I go next? Because I knew I had to GO! I decided on Costa Rica for a couple of reasons. I’d been to the country a few times over the past couple of years and had found incredible healing there. On my latest trip, I’d also met whom I thought was the most incredible man ever – yes, my DREAM MAN! I just had to see him again. So I closed down my life in Dubai, packed my bags, and went to Costa Rica.

It might seem desperate or crazy to go halfway across the world to see someone who you’re not sure likes you back. But if you’re ever going to take a chance on something, shouldn’t that be on love?! Even if the chance is one in a million

Fast forward a few months… Am I now enjoying Pura Vida on the beach with my “dream man”? I’m afraid not – the fucker dumped me for someone else. It broke my heart. But when I asked a shaman about how to deal with it, he said that I must trust that EVERYTHING that happens in life is good. I guess it’s as they say: everything is a blessing or a lesson.

And as heartbroken as I am, I guess I can already see the shaman’s point. Firstly, I’m proud of myself that I keep following my heart and having a shot at opportunities despite the risk of failure and rejection. (Like Janis Joplin said: Get It While You Can.) I prefer being heartbroken over being resentful at not having tried, and thinking, “What if?”.  I want to always remember my commitment to that 15-year old girl on the bus leaving the country town!

Secondly: after all of my soul searching across the world for the past fifteen years or so, I feel that I’ve FINALLY figured out the look of my best life. It’s here in nature, living a simple life. Waking up to birds singing, reading a book on the beach, going on retreats in the jungle with my friends. (A hot man would complete the picture, but I guess it would be boring if creating a dream life would be automatic!)

I think it’s easy to get caught up in what “dream living” looks like on Instagram or what people around us think is best for us. But that doesn’t matter at all! The only important thing is what kind of life YOU want to live. The biggest regret of the dying is to have lived a life that others expected of them, not a life true to themselves. So don’t let your sexy keto body go to waste. Get out there and start creating your dream life, NOW!

How to Figure out Your Best Life:

  1. Ask Yourself Questions.

Some could be: What activities make me feel my best? With whom do I most value spending time? If money wasn’t an issue, what would I do? 

  1. Get Inspired.

Read biographies, watch movies, talk to people you admire. What parts of these people’s lives do you want for yourself?

  1. Create a Vision of Your Best Life.

Some ideas are to make a vision board, do The Bull’s Eye exercise, use Self Authoring’s online program, or a journal from Kikki K. Don’t hold back, think big! Make sure that envisioning your best life is making you excited. And hang on to that excitement: personally, I take a few minutes every morning to close my eyes and envision my dreams.

How to Take Action for Your Best Life:

  1. Get Rid of Your Limiting Beliefs.

The most incredible life vision in the world won’t help if you don’t think that you’re deserving or capable of achieving it. My current favorite method (and the most powerful that I’ve tried so far) to get unblocked is shamanic retreats in Costa Rica, but I give examples of other (less intense) ways in this blog post.

And if you’re not ready to neither head out in the jungle or talk with a professional, just creating awareness of your limiting beliefs is a fantastic first step! Get inspired by this podcast episode with Gabrielle Bernstein.

  1. Make an Action Plan.

Research proves that you’re a lot more likely to achieve your goal if you write it down. So do it! At the moment, I’m using Wunderlist to make to-do lists to meet my weekly, monthly, and longer-term goals. Other great tools are The Productivity Planner and the SELF journal.

  1. Have a Support System.

You don’t have to make your best life happen on your own! In fact, it will be easier and more enjoyable with the support of others. Get a coach (you can inquire about my coaching services here) or an accountability buddy to follow through, or join a mastermind group.

And when there is no one around, and you’re freaking out and want to quit: read How to Stop Worrying and Start Living and use the CBT Thought Diary app to calm down.

Now over to you – what does YOUR best life look like? I’d love to hear! Get in touch and let me know. 

Love,
Alexia Bjarkan

Alexia Bjarkan
alexia@thebenefactory.com

Keto Coach at The Benefactory.

2 Comments
  • Barry
    Posted at 13:06h, 10 June Reply

    Love hearing your story! I just discovered Gabby Bernstein on Oprah’s Super Soul Podcast, and I registered for her free judgment detox. It took 5 minutes, and what an amazing difference in my attitude! Thank you for blogging !! ❤️❤️❤️

    • Alexia Bjarkan
      Posted at 16:11h, 11 June Reply

      Hi Barry,

      Thank you so much for reading and appreciating the post, it means a lot!

      Wow, Bernstein’s method sounds awesome – thank you for sharing. Good on you for taking action straight after listening to the podcast! 🙂 I’m about to start reading her book.

      x

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